. . . . . .

I THOUGHT WE WERE DIFFERENT.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT.
I REALLY THOUGHT THAT WE'D BE TOGETHER FOREVER.
I REALLY THOUGHT THAT WE'D BE GETTING MARRIED NEXT YEAR.
I REALLY THOUGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING.
I REALLY BELIEVED EVERYTHING YOU SAID.

just the beginning of this year, we were still planning our lives together.
how i'd take the same course, you'll guide me along.
how we'd probably end up in the same company.
you were telling me about the houses, the prices, installments.
(wow, while writing this, i took a break of a few min so i could finish crying. how pathetic i've become)
you were even happily telling me how you would make a study room so that our children would be able to have a good environment to study in.

A few months ago(april), you were still telling me how much you love me and that we would be together forever.
you still held my hand tightly, you still hugged me closely to you.

how fast things changes,
the very next month, you'd give me up, you'd give me up as though as i was nothing to you.
you'd still talk to me, meet me, hug me, kiss me..
but it gradually stopped.
even smses, phone calls.
it became an average of 0.0001 per week.
you said i was giving you stress, i was bothering you.
you said you didn't have time for me.
i would get it if you really were busy..
but no you're not.
i'm not gna say it out here.

i know everyone thinks im alright.
i know everyone thinks ive gotten over it.
i know everyone thinks ive forgotten.
but no i have not.
its just that no one reads this blog.
and partly because no one reads this blog, then only can i voice out my feelings this clearly.
but it also just shows that no one cares.

the posts on my twitter and facebook,
they're NOTHING compared to my feelings.